Continued Isolation

Well...the next day of my isolation was a mix of emotions, happiness and frustration. I was at home most of the day, sitting in my park, relaxing. My sis promised me to show up with some friends and keep me company. It was great to see so many of my friends enjoying themselves and having fun. It was great to see them there, knowing how much they care. But not being able to understand them, to follow their conversation and talk to them got more and more frustrating. Only a few days ago, at the beginning of my isolation, I was happy to be freed from all my duties, and enjoyed not having to talk, or needing to do anything. Now after a few days it gets harder and harder. Now it really sinks in what not being able to talk with my friends really means for me. Being isolated is not nearly as enjoyable as it was in the beginning. Sis and I talked on the phone for about two hours in the evening and bisected my feelings and emotions. That really helped me a great deal. Talking with her on the phone was like having a lifeline, my connection to one of the people I really love and who know what I’m going through at the moment. When I first began to fantasize about the isolation, I felt like I could do something like that for weeks, now I’m not even sure I want to go till the end of my sentence. Well…not that I have a choice. I’ve chatted with my keyholder for a long time. She’s the only one I can talk to in SL, you can’t imagine how happy I was when she logged in. We had a nice and interesting conversation and much fun. She did not read Eudeamon before my isolation and when she told me she finished reading it today and can truly understand why I craved to do this I was very happy. Not many of my friends could understand my wish to try this. We had a long and extremely interesting discussion about Eudeamon and our feelings while reading it. We talked about my experience during my short isolation and she decided to change her behavior towards me for the rest of my sentence. She will stop acting like my keyholder and confidant and just be my custodian from now on. And her second decision was that Kathi will cease to exist for the rest of my sentence and be replaced by K-47713. Sigh….so much for having at least one person to talk to. Crap….why did I urge her to read the story before the end of my isolation??

K-47713